9 Things to do Before Getting Pregnant

For many women, the path to getting pregnant is as smooth as silk. For some others, it can be a little more bumpy. Whatever group you belong to, here are 9 things to do that'll prepare you; body, mind and soul for the magical journey.       Learn your basic anatomy   That's a great place to start, especially for those who are not really familiar with the inner workings of the female anatomy. You can just skip this step if you are. You'll be surprised how little many Nigerian women know of the female reproductive system. Once, I was blog hopping along the Nigerian blog streets and I came across comments where women (many!) thought sex and urine take place in the same orifice! Someone even commented that peeing after inter course prevents pregnancy because you're rinsing it out...*blink blink*. It's the internet age ladies! Don't hide behind kunya and wallow in ignorance. Familiarise yourself with the workings of your uterus, ovaries, Fallopian tubes (oviduct), cervix, vaginal cavity and vulvas. Here's a diagram to get you started.  

Photo Credit

 

Stop contraception This may seem like a no brainer, but hear me out. If you've got a tentative timeline for when you want to conceive and you're currently on a contraceptive (especially hormonal!) you might want to give some time for the hormones to washout of your system and your cycle to stabilise. For example, women that choose to use depot injections might have to wait long periods before their fertility returns to normal. That's because the progestogen injected is deposited into their muscles and gradually released in micrograms over time. So even though it is said to last 3 months, that just means that the manufacturers (and pharmacists) can only guarantee you 99% pregnancy prevention for 3 months. After that, the pregnancy prevention (99%) won't go away immediately but will diminish over time. I've created a table below that tells you approximately how soon fertility returns after stopping the use of a contraceptive.

 

 

 

 

Women need to know these numbers BEFORE picking a birth control method so they can plan accordingly. Notice how I have a "What to do" section? That because my cousin just told me a horror story of how her friend removed her IUD by herself at home watching YouTube videos! WHY, WHY, WHY? Please don't attempt to do so. There's a reason why only trained medical personnel perform certain procedures and it's not to make your life more difficult. Quite the opposite, actually. There's nothing convenient or easy about pelvic inflammatory disease.

 

 

 

Know your cycle

Monitor your monthly cycle over a few months so you'll have a clear picture of your most fertile days. I.e. Your ovulation period. Ovulation happens halfway into your cycle when your brain signals the release of the lutenising hormone (LH) which causes one (if you're lucky, both!) of your ovaries to release an egg, which travels down the Fallopian tube to get fertilised. Based on the fact that sperm cells can last up to 5 days in the female body, your most fertile days start 5 days before ovulation and shortly after. Download a reliable period app or draw up a calendar and set up reminders for your ovulation period. I've drawn up an example calendar below that can serve as a guide for drawing up yours too.

 

Don't forget to get your partner involved but also, don't turn it into mundane task. "I'm ovulating, pants off." This can cause performance anxiety in many men. Instead, have fun with it and plan romantic dates that will take the pressure off. Whatever the outcome, you'll still have fun!    

This calendar is based on a 28 day cycle. Most cycles vary from 21 to 35 days, so please adjust yours accordingly.    

Get checked out

You're about to embark on a physically draining journey of 9 months, so it's important to see your doctor before hand to make sure you're well equipped for the ride. This is also a great opportunity for you to run questions by your doctor and separate all the junk you've been reading online from scientific fact. Some very important parameters to check include Blood Pressure, Blood Sugar Level, weight, BMI, HIV and Hepatitis statuses. If you haven't done so within the last two years, you might want to get a Pap smear test too. Also, a vaginal swab for bacterial vaginosis because many people have BV without any symptoms and untreated BV increases the chances of miscarriage, preterm birth and post delivery infections.

Take folic acid

 

 

Folic acid is certainly the most important supplement a pregnant woman takes as it ensures adequate development of the neural tube of the embryo and therefore prevents birth defects like spina bifida and cleft lip. However, before pregnancy, folic acid helps boost fertility and should be taken by both males and females when they are ready to conceive. 

 

In the female, Folic acid helps with oocyte maturation (development of the egg in the ovary before ovulation), implantation of the fertilised egg into the uterine walls and the development of a healthy placenta, all of which are incredibly essential for developing a healthy baby. It also boosts fertility in the female, especially if they've been diagnosed with idiosyncratic (unexplainable) infertility. In the male, Folic acid aids spermatogenesis, which is the production and maturation of sperm cells.

 

We've established that folic acid is such an important, essential vitamin and because the human body cannot make its own folic acid and folate rich foods do not produce enough for you and your baby, you will need to take folic acid tablets to ensure you and your partner have sufficient folate intake. In Nigeria it's sold as 5mg tablets and comes in packs of 100 tabs, so stock up and get popping!

 

 

 

Avoid Using Lubricants & Enhancers (Kayan Mata)

 

There is a longstanding debate over the effect of lubricants on sperm motility. While lubricants contribute immensely to a couples pleasure during intercourse, many studies suggest that the use of lubricants, especially water based, silicone based and oil based reduce the ability of the sperm to move forward, hereby preventing fertilisation. Others argue that the effects are only seen under the microscope but yet, see no difference in fertility between couples that use lubricants and those that don't in real life. I personally feel that it's best to avoid them temporarily when you're trying to conceive to increase your chances. The human body was designed to procreate and with the appropriate amount of foreplay, intercourse can be enjoyed without enhancers.

 

For my Arewa Babes, this also means you should avoid the use Kayan Mata (local aphrodisiac herbs and concoctions) when you're trying to conceive since most of them work by changing (thickening, scenting) the composition of the vaginal discharge. Especially the ones that require inserting.

 

Get Munching!

 

 

 

It is important to maintain a healthy diet rich in fruits and vegetables while trying to conceive. Not only are these foods rich in a wide range of vitamins and minerals which are necessary for good health but some of them contribute to fertility like leafy greens, which are high in folic acid and other B vitamins to boost fertility in the female and generate healthy sperm in the male. You'll also benefit from a diet rich in plant proteins (Beans, soya beans, lentils) and dairy products (full cream milk, cheese) which help boost ovulation. Foods rich in Omega 3 fatty acids like oily, low Mercury fish (Salmon) stimulate blood flow and help regulate hormones and ovulation.

 

 

Buy test strips... But don't use 'em just yet

 

 

Buy 2 to 3 pregnancy tests and keep on hand. Try not to be obsessed with taking pregnancy tests though. I know chick flicks have us all taking tests with different brands of pregnancy tests to "confirm," but guess what? From my experience, they're all the same. 

 

Pregnancy tests work by detecting levels of human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG) levels in the urine. HCG is detectable in both urine and blood once implantation has taken place so try not to take tests too early or else you'll get a false negative. Even though some brands claim to detect pregnancy from as early as two weeks, I feel getting a negative will stress you out and make you addicted to taking pregnancy tests so you end up spending heaps of money and gaining lots of stress from being anxious over negative results. Stress decreases your chances of conceiving so you see the vicious cycle?

 

I say buy 2 test strips (they cost 200 naira!) get a disposable cup and keep them in your bathroom. Monitor your cycle every month and see what's normal. Wait till one or two weeks AFTER your missed period then take the test. I guarantee you'll be saving yourself from so much stress.      

 

 

Relax! And have FUN.   

As I've mentioned earlier, stress decreases the likelihood of conceiving, so the best thing you can do for yourself is relax. The best way to not stress is to be informed. Don't go crying to your GP every month over negative tests. Avoid reading too many pregnancy forums, only go there when you have genuine questions. Just prepare yourself and wait, it'll happen in its own time. Indulge yourself with work, pick up a hobby, take long, warm baths, travel. Do things that make you happy and things you may find difficult when pregnant.

 

 

That's it guys! If you walk into a pharmacy when I'm on duty, these are tips that I'll offer you. They're derived from my personal experience and knowledge of physiology and pharmacy practice.

 

I hope you find my tips helpful. Which ones worked for you? 

 

Have I missed any useful tips? 

 

Let me know I'm the comments below!

 

Thanks!

 

Lots of "Bumpy" Love,

 

Ummi.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted with Blogsy

Where is my pregnancy glow?

Disclaimer: This post was drafted about 16 Months ago while I was pregnant with my daughter. I have since given birth to a lovely little girl and one year on, we are both doing well. This is a true story based on what I went through, just to lighten your mood with a glimpse of the everyday challenges some pregnant women go through. Make sure you share with someone who'd appreciate it. :)


As I sit here, back arched with 2 pillows, legs propped up against a chair and butt painfully aching, I can't help but realize someone, somewhere has pulled a fast one on me.

How? How did this happen? How did I, Fatima of Daura, let myself be deceived when I should've known better. For starters, I am not very gullible. Especially when it came to science-y stuff. I'm usually the one everyone goes to for all things body related. I am first a physiologist and then a pharmacist after all, and I did specialize in adaptations to stress and body control mechanisms. So you would think I'd have it all figured out. That when someone (everyone!) tells me blatant lies like:

"Pregnancy is a beautiful thing."

"You'll be eating for two,"

"You're going to love being pregnant!"

"You won't gain that much weight."

"It's easier than it looks."

"You'll have a glow."

...that I will take it with the proverbial grain of salt.

But no, I believed. Especially after the rocky road it took us to get here. I believed finally, with this double lined pee on a stick, I had reached my pot of gold. It couldn't get much more difficult from here, right?

Oh, how wrong I was.

I mean I wasn't a total mugu. I knew the delivery process was not going to be easy. In fact, I was terrified by the prospect of it. I mean, how can you possibly push a tuber of yam out of a toothpaste hole? But on that joyous pee on a stick day, I convinced myself that it was still 8.5 months away. I still had ages to prepare myself mentally, emotionally and physically for that very day. Until then, I shall cruise along with my growing pouch, eating whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted while everyone everywhere makes way for the almighty pregnant lady.

Turns out the only way people will be making was to avoid me lashing out at them or puking on them as I searched frantically for the perfect spot to aim my projectile vomit.

Then there's that awful feeling that comes afterwards. That empty, there's nothing-in-my-stomach-but-acid feeling that opens a waterfall of saliva, squirting in torrents from underneath your tongue, forcing it's way in all directions, gushing down your throat, seeping through your teeth. Before you even figure out what to do with this horrid saliva building up in your mouth, it returns. Only this time, there's absolutely no food in your stomach. So what comes out is stomach acid mixed with the unmistakeable bitterness of bile and, often, blood. Yes, blood. Not in a Nollywood I-shot-you-on-the-foot-so-you-should-vomit-5litres-of-blood way, but a small teaspoon.

But wait, there's more! The slight relief you feel post retching is quickly replaced by a razor blade sharp pain in your throat. Oh oh, this could only mean one thing. The stomach acid you just puked has corroded the lining on your throat (hence the blood). This also means, despite it being just 9am, you have no appetite for the rest of the day. All is not lost though, instead of eating all that yummy pepper soup (your right, as a preggy lady!) you get the pleasure of secreting even more bucket loads of saliva.

At this point one of your annoying nosy coworkers has started shooting you dirty looks. How dare you spit in public? Don't you know you're a lady? Nevermind that you're spitting in a civilized manner (not in a container, ewww, no! You have a clean plastic bag beside you and an entire roll of tissue beside it. You cover your mouth completely and spit discreetly into the tissue, fold it in two and then dispose it in the plastic bag which is stowed away from sight). But no, Nosy Coworker isn't satisfied with that.

But Motherly Coworker and Niceguy Coworker calm you with sympathetic looks. In an hour, they beg you to take a break. They may even buy you White soup from the Hospital Canteen (which you still can't eat!) and ask you to go sleep in the Pharmacy call room. And if they're feeling even more generous, they'll let you go two hours early, so you call The Husband and gleefully knock off for the day.

But the husband is worried. "How can you not eat all day? Don't you know you're carrying a baby?" At this point you wonder whether he cares more about you or "his" unborn child. Surely if he cared more about you he'd understand nausea is a terrible thing. So you take a detour to a nearby grocery store deli and he tells you to pick whatever you like. At the checkout counter the POS machine is taking too long and you've suddenly got the urge to pee. But the Checkout chick, with her rainbow toucan colored eyeshadow starts checking out the next person after you and your sale isn't through yet.

Oh, hell no! It all rushes to the surface; the bulbous acne that has now enveloped your skin, neck, back and even shoulders, your nose that's now big enough to stash an orange, the measly 3 hours of sleep you got last night because the baby is a Lionel Messi in the making, the skirt that didn't fit this morning, the feet that are so swollen you now wear thongs to work, the weight you're gaining even though you barely eat anything, that pregnant friend of yours who is further along than you are and is barely showing, that other friend who belittles your symptoms because she didn't feel them when she was pregnant, the boobs that are now very sore, the nausea, the vomiting, the taste of bile, the pain in your throat, the salivating, the nosy coworker, the food that smells so nice yet you can't eat, even the coke that you once loved so much but now only triggers heartburn. All that anger causes a nuclear fusion in your head and your wrath is unleashed on the Toucan Checkout Chick. "Customer Service is so poor in Nigeria," you rant heatedly. "How can you serve the next person when my sale isn't even though yet? Have you gone mad?"

The husband tries to calm you down. It's not that big of a deal. Though deep down inside you, you know he thinks you're overreacting. But he dares not say it. In fact, the words "because you're hormonal" have been permanently deleted from his vocabulary since you bit his head off over them months ago.

You continue the 15 minute journey home. "Stop the car!" You yell. Just 5 minutes away from home, but you can't wait any longer. You open the passenger door and aim for the pedestrian walkway to puke out another stomachful of acid, bile and blood. But this time, there's an additional liquid from another opening. You have inadvertently peed yourself.

"Shit!" You curse. And the husband gasps and raises his brows in alarm. "No, no, no, not literally!" You reassure him and he sort of calms down. Meanwhile, because you refused to completely let go during the vomit, you're still holding in half a bladder full of urine.

Miraculously you make it home in one piece. You make a beeline to the toilet directly. You take your clothes off in the tub. You fill it up with warm water and you want to relax and completely let go but no, you can't use your favourite Bath and Body works body wash because you absolutely hate the smell now. So you settle for Aveeno, unscented, but then 2 minutes in you realize you can't stand the humidity in the bathroom. You suddenly feel like you're suffocating and if you didn't get out right now, you'll keel over and die. So you rush out in a panic, unrelaxed and scared.

You put on the loosest bath robe you can find and make your way to the living room. The Husband has set up your spot for you. In front of the TV that has been tuned in to BBC Lifestyle, Directly underneath the AC, within arms reach of every remote control you'd ever need and a fresh roll of toilet paper and a plastic bag. He props your back up on a pillow and for the first time all day, you're somewhat comfortable, though something tells you that is going to be short lived.

Sure enough, you feel a sharp prod in the rear. Could it be? After nearly 5 days? Have your bowels finally called off their indefinite strike? Feels like it. You're sort of relieved. It must've been the warm bath, the doctor says it helps loosen the stool. But you're not going to the loo just yet. No, you have to play hard to get. The last thing you want is to sit on a loo for too long. That's how people get haemorrhoids, you don't want to add to this already difficult pregnancy.

He has to go out, he says. Dinner with friends and you're suddenly irrationally angry again. You want to blurt out your anger, but you keep it In. Deep inside, you're thinking: How dare he eat when you're going through hell? He is soo insensitive! He has no compassion! Gosh, men are so insensitive!

You ask him to do you a favour before he goes out. Could he please get you the Ribena you forgot in the freezer this morning. He brings it. Of course It's frozen. But you want Ribena. Unless he was willing to be late to dinner, he should let you have it. You ask him to bring you a pair of scissors and a teaspoon. He finally leaves. You cut open the top of the juice box, wedge your spoon in and into your mouth.

Oh. God! Where had this been all your life? The ice soothes the soreness of your throat and your stomach voraciously devours the sweet blackcurrant juice, it's first meal of the day. The second spoon comes with some brain freeze, but you pull through. Spoon after spoon, the colour is returning to your face. You've forgotten about the Toucan Checkout chick and the anger at Nosy Coworker had greatly diminished. You aren't even angry that the sadistic bitch you hated tied in first place on Come Dine With Me. Even the sharp prodding on your bum had softened to a numb spasm and you know for sure that tonight is the night you passed that number 2! The Husband returns from Di Maria with a takeout full of that prawn risotto you love. You think he's the best husband ever! Tonight's his night to get lucky.

You even manage to get 4 uninterrupted hours of sleep that night! All because of a pack of Ribena. You're going to get a carton tomorrow, you promise yourself. Maybe even mix it up. Ribena, Ziza, caprisonne! The possibilities are endless. You have found the key to a beautiful pregnancy. You deserve a Nobel Prize.

You get to work the next day, optimistic as can be. You spill it all to Niceguy Coworker. He's happy you've found comfort. He even offers to go to the store and buy you the Ribena later. But then Nosy Coworker overhears you.

"Are you not pregnant?" He asks with derision. "How can a pregnant woman take something cold? Frozen? You're not even supposed to drink something sugary. It is bad for your baby. You're being selfish."

It is only then you feel your eye colour change. Nuclear fusion is about to happen. All the unpleasant feelings that you've been bottling come to the surface: all that anger towards your husband that you dare not show because it's not his fault, the people who see you after months and tell you how big you have gotten, the fact that you can no longer sleep on your back or stomach and have to wake up 15 times a night to turn over, that you still have to work night calls just as many times as non pregnant coworkers right up to your EDD, the warning your OB GYN had given you about not eating, as if it were so easy to eat food, how Kate Middleton has the whole world worried about her Hyperemesis and here you have nearly everyone downplaying yours; you could've been a princess too! Nosy Coworker and all the annoying things about him: His deodorant that smells of old spice and rotten eggs, his accent that can't seem to decide whether it's Nigerian, American or Kenyan, the way he brandishes his political inclination and ridicules anyone who disagrees, his not so subtle tribalistic jabs at Hausa people even though he is well aware that it might offend nearly half of the staff present. You package it all nicely in a spontaneous tirade which left Nosy Coworker staring, mouth agape. He can't believe the otherwise quiet pharmacist can dish so eloquently. He tries to retort but other coworkers shut him up instantly. Doesn't he know you're pregnant? Why did he pick on you? He lingers shamefacedly for another five minutes and then he disappears.

Nosy Coworker changed departments that afternoon.

You continue your frozen Ribena diet until one afternoon two weeks later when you suddenly stop. You no longer cared for Frozen Ribena. You will now only eat Guavas. Un ripe Guavas.

Posted with Blogsy